First Blog award!

This is way too early. I have a blog, but I also know that having a blog doesnt make me a writer... I ramble.... I cant write …. at least not yet!

But it was very sweet of Spaceman spiff to think I have the potential

So Im just going to quietly follow the drill and be done with... and perhaps pass on the award to some bloggers who I think really CAN write. :)

Now for the usual tradition

# Link back the person who gave you the award.---- check!! 

( P.S : Thankyou... Its a Really Nice Birthday Gift!)

# 7 Random things about you (This wasnt very easy, I swear)

1. I sit still in my bed and smile .... every morning, at least for an hour. I cant start my day without that bit. 
2. Strings---- I have a huge crush on plucked instruments-- Acoustic Guitars- Flamenco, Baroque, Harp, Banjo- Oud, Kora, Sitar, Shamisen, Biwa, Ukelele, Balalaika...... the list never ends. Play me something really romantic on any of these, and Im yours........they have such an effect on me.
3. Im anti-diamonds! I probably would say NO to any guy who might get down on his knee offering me a diamond ring .
4. I love talking to myself and to my imaginary friends when Im in the loo. ( yeah, thats where I play out most of the conversations ---- the ones which I wish I were part of, the ones which I screwed up, the ones I wish would happen in real life........... I know what you're thinking now, but please keep it yourself :P)
5. I shamelessly ogle at babies. One reason why I love Anne Geddes. She makes me wanna get all those babies in a box and keep 'em for myself.( Reminds me of how Spaceman Spiff and I would go to the 0- 3 year old section at every store, and end up smelling, kissing and “awww”ing at cute tiny lil striped baby socks, night pants and dresses, till the people around gave us “ the looks”)
6. I love stationery- newly sharpened pencils, gel pens, rulers, erasers, sharpeners, notepads, calendar books, diaries, pen-holders, paper weights, scrap books................ you know what Im talking about.
7. I collect Nat-Geo photographs. I used to have a white board in my hostel room.... with all these pictures pinned up. Now since I have no access to the magazines , I collect them online.

My favourite song: Very very very unfair question! But I dont wanna break rules here... so here's one song Im quite popular for.

My favourite dessert : Death by chocolate , Chocolate souffle, Molten chocolate cake, …. basically anything just chocolate would do! But the caramal pudding I had with AJ at Casa Piccola was orgasmic!

What pisses me off : I just cannot think of any!.....I'll let you all know when I have one!.

Biggest fear: A cage........... being a prisoner of my own mind................NO I take that back.......my biggest fear would be not being able to Love.

Best Feature: A friend who was once opening the car's door for me, looks down and holds sight of my ugly ass feet, makes a really sad expression..... and looks up to say it on my face. But ends up saying..

“ Wow... you have ( stammers.... and finally blurts out)…...you have really beautiful eyes”!!

So EYES it is! ( 'cause I still, clearly remember the look on his face)

Everyday attitude: To find awesomeness and happiness in every single thing around me

What is perfection: Perfect is never doing anything wrong - which means never doing anything at all. Perfect is boring!

Guilty pleasure: Cheese balls : I think Im addicted to it. I find it really hard to stop munching on them. I love everything about it--- The bland taste of the cheese, the crunchiness of the corn grits and even the stale smell of it :P 

#Give the award away to 15 other bloggers--- Check

In random order

# Zeba- She's one blogger whose words have made way it into my small notebook .

# Just Kalpana- If I were a book publisher, I would sign a deal with her.. for a comic book series called “Stumped”

#Thomas theCat- I spent one whole night reading every single post in his blog. He's got a piquant sense of humour..........Im sure you'll like him.

#VnP- I think he's a really good writer, If only he blogged more often ( perhaps full-time writers need other pass-time activities)

#Toddler scribbles- That's no toddler-scribbling . Read her , and you'll know why

# Lilyferus- Im really really glad that I got to know her! She's a nut case and I just love her for all the brilliant madness that she is!

# Keep Smiling- He is just like the name of his blog.. .. all smiles!.. And an infectious one that too . He's got this amazing talent of spreading those smiles as well.

# Blue Lotus,Cloud Nine and Nirvana: Im new to their blogs....and now I regret I couldnt get to them earlier!.

# Hey you, Spaceman Spiff, Full-Adda Diddi.- uhhh...... errr...........hmm... There are no words that can describe you guys!.... Instead I'll give you all a bear hug!!

# Chocoholic, and Red handed :You've become like family now....:) I get worried if I dont get to read a new post of yours every week.

EAR MILK

Background Note: Introducing a dear friend, VnP ( Visions and Perceptions), who took sweet pains to turn an otherwise boring birthday of mine into rather a memorable one.

I hadnt moved an inch from my bed that day and I was almost positive that Im in a relationship with my mattress and pillows , when he calls up and says, “ Im not happy with what Im writing. So how about I just give you a list of songs I like, and may be catch up over dinner tonite?”

So I quickly take a cold shower, which I thought might slap me awake from my 'comfortably numb' state.

We ended up in TGIF and over the first half we spent there, he kept telling me that I was lost!

And I kept telling myself,.......Gosh, Im getting old!

We decided we wont order for the dessert. We are so stuffed already!

That thought had hardly passed when the service lads of TGIF comes to our table with a delicious looking chocolate cake and a CHAIR!.

And what happened next must have been a very good laugh for everyone else in the restaurant . 'Cause I was dancing on that chair to a Birthday song I've never ever heard in my life with all the waiters singing and clapping around me. ( Apparently thats the TGIF tradition!)

Thank you VnP! Perhaps another day, I 'll get back to you for that!

You can find much of his sensible, hilarious and very very creative writings , ramblings and character sketches here , here and here.

So heres his choice of songs for now. I like all of it already. Hope you all like 'em too.!!

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Foals - Blue Blood

Beautiful vocals. Peaceful guitar. And it all picks up gently to a nice crescendo. And lets you fall from there slowly. You will probably go back to this song for its opening.

Foster the People - Pumped Up Kicks

Another Indie band, but these guys have made it pretty big. The song is smooth with a very catchy chorus and the whistling bit in between just nails the song.

(Yes, they've been Vevo-ed. That means they are going up the commercial charts.)

Charlotte Gainsborough - Trick Pony

The Myntra ad had this amazing amazing track. Just when we were thinking it was an original, comes Charlotte Gainsborough with Trick Pony. Her album IRM is a brilliant mesh of electronic sounds, heavy percussion that also includes some unconventional Indian bits. But for now, Trick Pony.

Gotye - Somebody that I Used to Know (Feat. Kimbra)

Last year I discovered Heart's a Mess, and Gotye does it again with this song. Eclectic sounds, beautiful arrangement and that quintessential Gotye vocals. Give it a listen on good speakers or headphones. The chorus is again really really lilting. And wait for Kimbra to arrive with her bit.

Junip - To the Grain

In all this Junip has to be the find of the month. Amazing vocals from Jose Gonzales. Beautiful sounds layered with synths, acoustic guitar and that voice that will just set your heart going. The live version of Junip's To The Grain shows how beautiful their music is inherently, unlike bands like Weatherwanes who sounded really terrible live.

-- Gopi

Im a girl .... and Im an emotional creature!

It was just a few years back I discovered that tears,....................... tears can liberate you!

It took me 19 years of my life to cry ….....My folks back home still tell people of my heroic childhood stories, of how I wouldnt even wince, if I got myself cut, or If Im hurt while playing. My knees or fingers would bleed, but I'd wipe it off with my skirt and get myself upto the next mischief.

For me, crying or being emotional in any way until a couple of years back was synonym to being weak!

And I always wanted to be brave.

Now as I look back, I see what a coward I was to hide and hoard all my true emotions . I ran way from them rather than expressing, confronting or owning them.

It took 19 years for the floodgates to open and unleash the wrath within.

I cried that day without a break for an hour and a half ( no exaggerations here) and that too in a public forum with tonnes of young people staring at me.

Reason?? I cant remember …..........I know, its all the denying of being emotional, refusing to 'feel' and the suppressing of 'feeling' that got me there.

The reason didn't matter anyways. What mattered was that the heavy and iniquitous ice berg of piled up emotions had started melting. What mattered was the process ---- the purgative effect . What mattered even more was that this breaking down, thereby had shaped me into a much braver person. And what mattered most was that I had discovered the 'girl' in me.

I love being the 'girl' now. And this is for all those who loves being in touch with the 'girl' in them.

***I AM AN EMOTIONAL CREATURE

I love being a girl.

I can feel what you're feeling

as you're feeling it inside

the feeling

before.

I am an emotional creature.

Things do not come to me

as intellectual theories or hard-shaped ideas.

They pulse through my organs and legs

and burn up my ears.

I know when your girlfriend's really pissed off

even though she appears to give you what

you want.

I know when a storm is coming.

I can feel the invisible stirrings in the air.

I can tell you he won't call back.

It's a vibe I share.

I am an emotional creature.
I love that I do not take things lightly.
Everything is intense to me.
The way I walk in the street.
The way my mother wakes me up.
The way I hear bad news.
The way it's unbearable when I lose.

I am an emotional creature.
I am connected to everything and everyone.
I was born like that.
Don't you dare say all negative that it's a
teenage thing
or it's only only because I'm a girl.
These feelings make me better.
They make me ready.
They make me present.
They make me strong.

I am an emotional creature.
There is a particular way of knowing.
It's like the older women somehow forgot.
I rejoice that it's still in my body.

I know when the coconut's about to fall.
I know that we've pushed the earth too far.
I know my father isn't coming back.
That no one's prepared for the fire.
I know that lipstick means
more than show.
I know that boys feel super-insecure
and so-called terrorists are made, not born.
I know that one kiss can take
away all my decision-making ability
and sometimes, you know, it should.

This is not extreme.
It's a girl thing.
What we would all be
if the big door inside us flew open.
Don't tell me not to cry.
To calm it down
Not to be so extreme
To be reasonable.
I am an emotional creature.
It's how the earth got made.
How the wind continues to pollinate.
You don't tell the Atlantic ocean
to behave.

I am an emotional creature.
Why would you want to shut me down
or turn me off?
I am your remaining memory.
I am connecting you to your source.
Nothing's been diluted.
Nothing's leaked out.
I can take you back.

I love that I can feel the inside
of the feelings in you,
even if it stops my life
even if it hurts too much
or takes me off track
even if it breaks my heart.
It makes me responsible.
I am an emotional
I am an emotional, devotional,
incandotional, creature.
And I love, hear me,
love love love
being a girl.

***By Eve Ensler, a playwright and activist, is the founder of V-Day and author of 'Vagina Monologues'. And this is an excerpt from   I Am an Emotional Creature : The Secret Lives of Girls Around the World

Its called Patience

Disclaimer: Hard-core Ranting.................. I wouldnt mind it if you moved on without reading

I am committed life long, to a philosophy of 'love-all'. Yeah, I never had to try .It just comes to me.

And its not in my nature to dislike people.

But lately I have realised that there some people Im beginning to not-so-like very much.

It has taken some real hard work on your part to earn that, people!!

So here are the fabulous four who has made it to the top:

# 'Im All-Important'

These kinds ARE important, they KNOW that they are important, and the part that I dislike about them is that they love to inject their importance on others.

The interesting thing is that they are intelligent enough not to come across as boastful or boisterous. They are the ones who have cleverly mastered the art of what I call 'subtle-extortion'.

They bully you and make you feel cheap and good-for-nothing in the most dignified manner.

You tend to have a strange sort of respect for  the shadow of authority they cast upon you, but you also want to curse them, for the Dementorial effect they have on you.

Yes, these people are capable of sucking the happiness out of even a Patronus Charm.

These power hungry ones are happy as long as you're feeding their ego. And don't you dare get tired of it, otherwise you're counting at some really bad days.

Dear 'Nota Bene', Its nice to be important. But I think its more important to be nice.

# 'Im in awe of you'

Im afraid to say this, but you guys are a nuisance. Im sorry if my charisma is that overpowering and overwhelming, theres nothing much I can do about that. It doesnt feel all that good when you try to drool me in your uber-nonsensical-flattery. And its not-so great, to keep hearing “ ohh, you're so cool” every 10 secs in a 5 minute conversation. And it shouldn't bother you, what diet I follow , or what I sleep in, and what color my nail-paints are!!!!

So if Im too polite to shoo you away , you'll take advantage of my niceness??

You're lonely, I get it. 

So, heres a piece of advice for you.............

Dear 'Awe-full', If you can't enjoy your own company, atleast don't inflict it on others.

# “I always want to help”

Im a girl, agreed, but I don't need you all the time. I would like to do some things on my own.

Yes, I know the world is bad, and there are scary vultures waiting to devour on me raw, but honestly, I feel much safer when Im alone.!

I appreciate all the efforts you have taken , all the ways you have went out of, to make things smoother and easier for me. But trust me when I say this, all of your 'creative intervention' ( read interference) has only messed up my life. It shouldn't offend you when I refuse your help next time around, because I have learnt to ask or receive only from 'the givers of a higher level'. Who would not make me feel like a debtor.

But if you're thinking this a good way to woo me , by hammering down such unwanted concern and unnecessary care , then Dear 'Helpful', you're much mistaken.

# I am always right

They studied the right thing, they are working at the right place, they are getting the right sum and got married at the right time to the right person.

These people are the only ones apparently, who are leading the most successful life. Rest of us are losers!

They have made the most intelligent decisions in life, and rest of us are about to doom because we studied literature and now wants to make documentary films.

“Archiving traditional art forms?? Whats the use ??Such a waste of time and money!” ( I should ask your mother if she thinks of you the same way, now that you've grown up )

“Not married?? You will grow up into a frustrated grumpy old woman” ( Getting married to someone like you would be suicide, I prefer being the grumpy grandmother, Thankyou!)

It doesnt matter to them, if you are the first woman from India to win a Green Oscar , because at the end of the day you are not them. They are themselves the benchmark of being 'successful'.And that means you are not a success in life unless you have an MNC job in a metropolitan city, and a non working spouse with a professional degree who came with a dowry almost as worth as one of those treasure chests uncovered at the Padmanabhapuram Temple, and finally two A+ scoring kids studying in the most expensive CBSE school in the town.

Dear 'Always Right', Please get back to me on how dirty my door carpet is, when you have cleaned up the mess in your own backyard!

Dear Reader,

If  you have sat through this post till here, please allow me to let you know that I am blissfully blind to flaws and imperfections in most cases. Please judge this only as a momentary venting out of some pent up feelings. Otherwise I am extremely tolerant with all of the above 'dear-ones' usually. After all, its my fervid conviction to try and put up with all those who wants to put me down. And I believe that is what you call patience.